WHAT EFFECTS DOES YELLING HAVE ON YOUR CHILD?

Many times parents tell me it's not possible to just talk to Children calmly without yelling because they will not hear.

My response: "You have wired them/raised them to respond to only yells and shouts”.

There is no such thing as a perfect child, they all fight with their siblings, ignore their chores, or upset you in one way or the other.
I often say a child must be a child is your Job to remain an Adult too.

We must begin to pay attention to the things we say to our children especially when they upset us. We think that saying things with just words might not be abusive since we are not hitting but you might be creating more psychological harm than you can imagine. Someone told me recently how the words of her Dad ( who never hit her) almost destroyed her as a girl and an adult

Children perceive shouting as a threat to their sense of security, safety and confidence. Long-term exposure to shouting can result in fear, anxiety, stress, insomnia, developmental delays, behavioural problem, academic issues, social difficulties, emotional issues and thwarted coping skills ... (Sihweil)

Yelling is as bad as physical Abuse!

The problem with yelling is that what comes with it compounds the problem. It's not just the loud voice that has an impact, it's also the body language and the actual words used (which could be critical, Insulting or sarcastic)

Shouting is largely ineffective!!  It doesn't get the message across because the children are often times too busy defending themselves and totally miss the point.

Now don't get me wrong, we are all humans and sometimes we slip, but Intentionality makes you understand when you do you should fix it. Because occasional shouting won't have any major long-term effects, especially when you fix it!

Just know that Shouting is like a human fire alarm, so use it with caution and only when there is a danger.

If you want to raise a child with strength and coping mechanisms use Firm, Calm and compassionate tone. This allows the child's brain to remain open and learn. Research has shown When there is adrenaline for fear of being shouted at, theirs is limited thinking capacity

Ditch shouting for good

#excerpts from my book ConnectToCorrect

©Wendy  Ologe
Parent Coach